Consider the following definition of abuse: Abuse is any attempt to gain power or control over another person using physical, mental, spiritual, or emotional strategies. In other words, abuse occurs when there is a pattern of one person trying to gain Power and Control over another. One of the most obvious ways to control another person is by using violence – such as hitting someone, holding them down or sexually assaulting someone. However, there are other ways of controlling a person that do not include physical violence and are not so easy to spot.

Instead of using physical or sexual violence, many abusers may use verbal, emotional or mental (psychological) or financial tactics to control the other person. They are more subtle. Often people do not recognize them as abuse. But they are abuse, and they often lead to physical violence.